I’ve made the decision to stay in Idaho for surgery and treatment. The first surgery is scheduled for Monday. Dr. ENT will be removing the tumor from my scalp and the in-situ from my cheek. A second surgery is scheduled for Wednesday, if needed. Friday morning will be the bigger surgery with Dr. Chest doing the tumor removal from my chest wall and Dr. ENT doing the closing and reconstruction of my scalp and cheek.
I’ve debated and struggled with the decision for the last week. I became so emotionally exhausted by the entire process. Eating anything was painful. Each time the food reached my stomach I felt like I was being punched. I think I even lost my sense of humor for a while.
That being said, I’m just ready to get on with this thing. I meet with Dr. Z one last time tomorrow morning to go over a few more details and then we get started.
I still have a few stories that I haven’t included yet, so I’ll try to include those over the next few days. Depending on how I feel, I may have Mom write some updates as well.
Thanks to everyone who has helped over the last month! All of the cards, emails, phone calls, gifts and meals have been amazing!!! Some folks have said they were hesitant to call or write… there’s no need to feel that way. I’ve really appreciated hearing from everyone! The personal stories have particularly touched me. There’s so much honesty and intimacy in these stories. They have been the ultimate in encouragement. I also want to say thanks to the people who are helping to take care of my family while all of this is going on. I’ve had wonderful conversations with Grandma about all of this, but there is really no way for me to help Nana understand and I REALLY don’t think it’s helpful for me to even try to explain any of this to her. With my family spending so much time in Idaho over the next month, I end up in tears each time I think about Nana not having Mom to visit her each day and having no way to understand why no one is there to see her. Its fun for me to talk with her now… she’s so proud of how the well the Angels are playing. We spoke earlier of playoff hopes this year and I love hearing the “WOW” from her when I tell her they have a 15.5 game lead.
For now, I have to go vacuum… Mom is coming on Sunday.